What Makes Me.....Me (part 1)

I have been reading "The Secret Message of Jesus: Uncovering the Truth that could Change Everything" by Brian McLaren. I'm not here to talk about the book much but it has really knocked me off the norm and made me think about myself in a whole different way. I don't know what about it has spurred on my self reflection but I have done some serious thinking on what makes me tick.... Partially, I think, I am doing this because I enjoy dissecting other people and trying to understand peoples' motives are and I have never really studied myself that well. It's been interesting to look and analyze my day to day actions. I feel like a great place to start is with my parents; after all, I am half of each of them. Now there is no question I 'mildly' resemble my father. I have to say we are striking men... but more on that later. I feel like my mom's main influence has to be my attitude. I'd like to think I carry some of her caring qualities and ability to see the better in people. I don't claim to be the quality of individual that my mother is by a long ways. For instance, I like to put Bryan first while my mother has always placed herself last. That is part of the reason that I am successful today is my mom carrying me through the tough stuff. And I assure that if she reads this she will simply say "that's my job... as a mom." Now Its easy to trace why my mother is who she is. She and I are loners, like her dad. Compassionate, like her mom. Caring, like both her parents.  I know that I am a mixture of that blood that worked out to be me. I means so much to me that I feel like my entire life's purpose could be to carry on that blood and that would be sufficient. I could write a book on my mother and not get enough out there so I will just move on. My work ethic, my strength, and independence all come from David. Now I list those off quickly but they are all things that I feel like I had to be taught. It is something to for me to pick up these qualities and I will forever be in debt to him helping me become the success I know I can be.
Now I grew up in a house of women for sure. I lived with four sisters for a good portion of my life and it is something that I love about me. Jessica has always been that example of making it work. Later in life she has been invaluable in the way she allows me to bounce ideas off her and can give me honest advice without a bias. She has a way of cutting the bull shit without being harsh. Lacey has always been the image of what I never was. I was not the strong attitude in high school, nor the athlete she is. I was never that attractive or had girl problems like she has boy problems like she has. But Lacey has a special place with me because she was someone that I always felt like took what I had to say to heart. She at least pretended to need my advice and enjoyed getting it. It was nice to be looked up to. And last but not least A & B. Now I dont mean to lump you two together but yall are always a pair. It has been a pleasure to watch you two grow up and see two different personalities form in the same environment. I enjoy seeing it every minute.....

 There is more to come on all this but I have to sleep now. I just felt like really getting a lot of this out on paper... You all mean so much to me... I don't say it enough... There are several more I want to include and plan to in future sections....

Dieting: Phase 2

So here we go...the dieting is now in full swing(not working out). I have officially jumped into my second phase of dieting. (Mostly because Phase 1 was a total Failure). Phase 2 is related more to the other side of losing weight, working out (because my fat butt can't stop eating). I am really excited about (dreading) the idea of getting in the habit of running and lifting. I am ready for lost long 45 minute (second) runs that are refreshing (miserable) and can really brighten (ruin) a day. I am so (not) excited about this new phase of dieting and I think it will be a great thing for my body.

Counting, Tests, and a Honeymoon

Heres the run down... heads up its complicated.

• Order - I want the turkey, with green beans and corn. That'll be $8.66 and 750 calories.
• Record- Now I pull out my phone the instant it goes through and record $7.50 in my expense counter for my personal finance class
• OOPS- I realize that I have switched the numbers and go back into the program and fix it.
• Eat- self explanatory
• Record- I search for the foods in my calorie counter and input them.
• I'M OVER BUDGET AND STARVING

Yes, ladies and gents my fat but has officially started a diet and let me just tell you it is really hard to comfort yourself without comfort food. Not to mention its 90 below outside and all my body wants me to do is bulk up. What in my right mind made me want to do this to myself. Not only am I in a bad mood, I can't eat to make it better. Oh yeah I remember why I'm doing this.... I want to be sexy. Okay not really, I just want to more closely resemble a normal human than a damn beach ball. With that in mind, I have got to find something to eat that kills the hungry but doesn't leave me 8 calories for supper. I made a legitimate effort today. I made myself some spaghetti for supper... It was awful. I did a horrible job picking sauces. Oh well, moving on. Everyone knows dieting sucks.

I have a test tomorrow in internet programming. It's hilarious how much I have stared at code the last week wondering what exactly is wrong with it and not having a clue how to figure it out. Last week I had a Strategic Management test from hell that I hope to get a grade back for soon and my test in audit is just around the corner. School is officially no fun at all. Maybe I can get a jump on it soon.

And the good news for this post..... The honeymoon is booked. I'm pretty excited about this part. Its going to be beautiful. I bet you wish you could come... too bad. haha
Anyway I need to go now.... I have to find something to eat.

A boy, a man, and a groom

There is a boy that I know very personally. He makes me laugh sometimes when I think of the things he does. When I look him in the eye everyday it is even more amusing because everyday he looks less like the boy that he is. But there is no doubt. He sleeps until noon on Saturday and then proceeds to watch Tom and Jerry. He likes to eat fast food and ice cream, watch things burn and blow up and play sports. The easiest way to tell that he is a boy is his lack of concern for those around him. Good or bad, he simply thinks about how things affect him and is incapable of placing himself second.

Now there is another personal acquaintance that I know exceptionally well. He is a man. There is no doubt. He he has a mustache and beard. Monday through Friday he gets up and goes to work. Sometimes he works well into the evening to make sure that the work gets done. If you look in his eyes, they look tired. Most of his smiling is done to be courteous, not because he is happy. A nice evening is one on the couch with his girl beside him watching some funny movie that takes him out of reality. Its not all bad for him though. He has a loving smile and takes care of himself for the most part. He is proud of what he has accomplished as a man. He has earned the respect and the confidence of those around him. 

Now the final person of interest is a groom to be. Now this is one excited guy. He looks forward to his wedding in July amongst his family on a beach. He is excited about a new life that waits for him with his new wife. He has his concerns, too. He is nervous about this type of commitment. He has no doubt that she is the one but its scary to know that she will rely on him so heavily. When he things of husbands he says he sees things like strong silent men who work long hours and lose that personality that they had as kids. He's afraid he's coming to the end of the time that he can lay around the room and belch and fart and no one care. He is just a little scared. I pray for him that he will be the man he needs to be every night.  

The Thoughts of a Distracted Blogger

Well if you have made your way to my blog (past my sisters) I am impressed because my niece is one cute baby, but if you are looking for some of that ushy gooshy crap you’re going to be disappointed. Don’t get me wrong… I love her to death but that’s Jessica’s thunder and who am I to steal it. So if you are interested in my thoughts there are a lot of them so brace yourself. An insane amount of greatness has happened to me since I spilled on this blog so I am going to try and cover at least most of it.
Washington D.C. - So Dad totally hooked me up on this trip. It was a blast. I don t even really know where to begin but I guess I will try to explain it from my eyes. Okay the thing about the city itself was the subway system. I mean it is really like a little city down there. For a guy from West Texas where the mass transit system is a tractor with a trailer, that was pretty amazing. I am really not that patriotic of a person but being there really stirs up some pride. I don’t care who you voted for last year or what you think of your congressman, when you see those huge white pillars and all the great history commemorated there, you would have to have broken not to get all worked up. It was really interesting that dad and I spent most of the time we were walking around in silence. It’s so breath taking that it feels like words are inappropriate. My favorite day was the day we went and saw the cemetery and the Iwa Jima Monument. The Arlington Cemetery really makes you feel like you take advantage of that freedom you enjoy. The words “Uncommon Valor was a Common Virtue” (in gold on the Iwa Jima monument) shoots chills through my spine when I think about everything our country has been through. The whole trip was just amazing. I enjoyed every minute. Great father-son bonding time before father became grand-father.
Baby Cate – I have a gorgeous niece….. Look out there is a new Uncle Bubba in town.
Another Semester Down- I have successfully completed my lower level curriculum at Texas Tech University. That’s right folks I am now half educated. That’s right 66 hours and 12 grand into it and I can get half a feeling of accomplishment. It was close there at the end….. Serious burn out there at the end.
And all the rest- new roommates, tax refund, dominating at risk (that’s right… I conquered the world with no mercy) new friends at school. Pure madness all around me as my friends from high school get engaged and married. Life is good.
And I have to add one complaint to make… AT&T. Now didn’t they get split up about 10 years ago... for monopoly…. Oh but wait there is a new word for it now isn’t there… bundle package. This company has to be the single most frustrating thing I have dealt with since… well… my ex girlfriend….Gah they are ridiculous… I went in there about a week ago and got all the stuff I needed to get high speed internet. They tell me that there will be a person at the house between 8 and 12. I assume (my fault) that they want me present for this because they have every other time they were coming out here. So I take off work and sit at the house for 4 hours only to have no one come out. Okay I’m still okay at this point. I call them and they say that I don’t need someone to come out…. I should just be able to plug it in and go. Now I’m getting a little mad. So I plug it in and go through this painful install process for an hour only to find that I have no DSL signal….Okay now I pissed. I call them up and they tell me that my account is pending until 8pm so I should try after that. Like the stars were going to align and shoot the internet into my house like some weird sci-fi movie. But I humor them and go eat supper with Jess and Cory and try to cool off. At 10 pm it still doesn’t work after another attempt to install it myself. So I call them up and I did well. I kept my cool. She told me that I was going to have to call AND HAVE SOMEONE COME OUT AND WORK ON IT. Sound familiar? Wasn’t that what was supposed to happen during that 4 hour period. But get this… The order center is closed until Monday so I had to wait till then to call them and put in an order. Yah… that poor soul I talked to Monday afternoon….. she had no clue what was coming. I totally lost my cool on that poor woman. I am ashamed to say it but I took my frustration out on her…. I felt bad until she just transferred me to another department… and another… and another until it wasn’t even worth getting into it. So I am posting this from the parking lot of a Best Western. (burn in hell AT&T) Hope you enjoyed it….

You May All Go to Hell..... I'm Going to Mexico

I could have titled this one of several things... The Fever, Mexico or Crazy, Mexican Holiday, among other things. As I looked at pictures of my little slice of paradise on Jessica's TV a couple of days ago, this craze came over me. I have the image of crystal clear water lapping up on white sand etched into my mind. You know that kind of feeling where you can close your eyes and almost feel that coastal wind on your face and smell that ocean air. Palm trees rise up out of the floor around you and that nasty rocker your sitting in becomes a yellow hammock hung from the balcony behind the beach bar at Xpu Ha. All the hectic mess washes away as you find pease in the sound of the surf. That small group of indeviduals (or even that one person) that you want to be there can be found in the hammocks around you. Your postcard-like surroundings make you once again wonder why the hell you would ever go home. You reach for that drink in a coconut sitting on the table next to you. As the cold drink hits your tongue BAM! What is supposed to be a cold citrus beverage turns out to be nasty Lubbock tap water. Just like that you are in your lonely house hundreds of miles away from anything remotely close to that tropical heaven. I know my writing skills are not quite to the caliber to where i can take you there as easily as i can get there. But either way... yes its official, i need a beach. And if you need one too... Close your eyes and come with me... cuz im goin back now.

New Colors And Picture

Got tired of doing homework today so I did a little redecorating. Oh and look at my awesome new picture.... Professionally done.

Thanks Cory and Jess for taking those they look amazing!!!